the phrase “you have to love yourself before you can love others” is a highly contested topic on my instagram. there are a variety of opinions on the topic, and it’s definitely a challenging concept to wrap your mind around. join me as i walk through some of the quotes i’ve saved on self love, and read my opinions on each. all of the quotes can be found on my instagram.
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i love this idea of loving being yourself. self love can be a tricky topic, because it’s a process and one that’s certainly very long and can be difficult for most people. the idea of loving being yourself resonates a bit more with me because it seems more natural. you’re focused on your environment and happiness, instead of prioritizing how others perceive you. my mindset is that other peoples’ perceptions of you don’t matter as much as you think they might. if you’re confident in yourself and your identity, it will show! and even more- you don’t have to be perfect in order to be confident. often times our confidence comes from our imperfections, which are the very things that set us apart from others. the end of this quote “life is not experiencing you” is honestly something i’ve never thought about before, but it’s true. you can’t let outside forces control your life. you are the one experiencing life, and it’s yours to conquer!
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this quote is a bit more honest than the last, which is something that i really appreciate. i’ve noticed that sometimes quotes hide what they’re really trying to say with excessive words and pretty phrases, but this perspective gets straight to the point. i’m not sure how i feel about this one! i agree that recognizing your own value is important, but i don’t think that it’s directly connected to accepting mistreatment. in the sense that standing up for yourself has to do with having a strong identity, i understand how recognition of personal value comes into play. i don’t think that people who aren’t as confident in their identities are weaker in any way, and that could be one point of view that this quote suggests. however, i don’t claim to know the author’s intention behind their writing, but i rather do like this quote! it presents a new perspective that i haven’t really thought about in terms of self love.
credit: weheartit
okay, on to the next! i agree with this statement- “it all starts with me.” however, the next line “i am going to change myself first so that everything can align for me” doesn’t resonate as much with me. i admire the intention behind the writing, but i don’t think we need to completely change ourselves to be accepted or to discover our paths. i’m a very strong believer in karma and that we receive the intention we put out into the world, but the idea of changing yourself so that things align doesn’t really fit with my definition of self love.
credit: anna gamal via tumblr
this is one of my favorite quotes and perspectives on self love, because it presents a lot to think about! i think there are definitely more than two loves in your life, and they’re not confined to people. you can definitely love cities, places, nature, animals, and so on, it just forms a new identity of love that you may not have considered yet. there’s platonic love, romantic love, and the list goes on and on. there’s as many definitions of love as you’d like to admit, because we discover new types of love every day (even if you label it by a different name). i also disagree with the idea that if you find a second love, you never loved the first. this is a slippery slope to slide down, because you might start prioritizing different types of love over each other, and comparing the people and objects of your affection and rank them. it’s difficult to label some types of love as better than others, because it’s all up to personal interpretation!
thank you for reading!
this is a new style of post that i haven’t tried yet, but i hope you enjoy! feel free to comment or reach out to me with your perceptions of self love, i’d love to hear them.
signing off,
jess